', $text);
//moved to more global css generation process @version: 2.0
//$this->add_css_wrap[$unique_class]['a']['display'] = $do_display; //do_display defines if we should write display: block;
//$this->add_css_wrap[$unique_class]['a']['full'] = $do_full; //do full styles (for categories and tags separator)
$unique_class .= '-a';
}
if($do_ignore_styles) $unique_class = 'eg-'.esc_attr($this->handle).'-nostyle-element-'.$layer['id'];
//replace all the normal shortcodes
if(function_exists('qtrans_useCurrentLanguageIfNotFoundUseDefaultLanguage')){ //use qTranslate
$text = qtrans_useCurrentLanguageIfNotFoundUseDefaultLanguage($text);
}elseif(function_exists('ppqtrans_useCurrentLanguageIfNotFoundUseDefaultLanguage')){ //use qTranslate plus
$text = ppqtrans_useCurrentLanguageIfNotFoundUseDefaultLanguage($text);
}elseif(function_exists('qtranxf_useCurrentLanguageIfNotFoundUseDefaultLanguage')){ //use qTranslate X
$text = qtranxf_useCurrentLanguageIfNotFoundUseDefaultLanguage($text);
}
$text = do_shortcode($text);
if($special_item == 'true' && $special_item_type == 'line-break'){ //line break element
echo ' '."\n";
}elseif(trim($text) !== ''){ //}elseif(!empty($text)){
$use_tag = $base->getVar($layer['settings'], 'tag-type', 'div');
echo ' <'.$use_tag.' class="esg-'.$class.$post_class.$video_play.$ajax_class.' '.$hideunderClass.$unique_class.$transition.'"'.$ajax_attr.$transition_split.$delay.$hideunderHTML;
echo ($demo == 'custom') ? $demo_element_type : '';
echo $data_transition_transition . '>';
echo $text;
echo ''."\n";
}
}
/**
* Retrieve the value of post elements
*/
public function get_post_value($handle, $separator, $function, $meta, $catmax = '-1', $taxonomy = ""){
$base = new Essential_Grid_Base();
$text = '';
/* 2.1.5 category max option */
$adjustMax = false;
if( in_array( $handle, array( 'cat_list','tag_list','taxonomy') ) ) {
if(!empty($catmax) && $catmax !== '-1' && is_numeric($catmax) && intval($catmax) > 0) {
$catmax = intval($catmax);
$adjustMax = true;
}
}
switch($handle){
//Post elements
case 'post_id':
$text = $base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', '');
break;
case 'post_url':
$post_id = $base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', '');
$text = get_permalink($post_id);
break;
case 'title':
$text = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_title', '');
break;
case 'caption':
case 'excerpt':
$text = trim($base->getVar($this->post, 'post_excerpt'));
if(empty($text)){
//strip essential grid shortcode here
$text = do_shortcode($base->strip_essential_shortcode($base->getVar($this->post, 'post_content')));
$text = preg_replace("/" break; case 'meta': $m = new Essential_Grid_Meta(); $text = $m->get_meta_value_by_handle($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''),$meta); break; case 'likespost': $post_id = $base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''); if(!empty($post_id)){ $count = get_post_meta($post_id, "eg_votes_count", 0); if(!$count) $count[0] = 0; if(is_array($count)){ $text = ''.$count[0].''; } } else{ $text = ''; } break; case 'alias': $text = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_name'); break; case 'content': $text = apply_filters('the_content', $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_content')); break; case 'link': $text = get_permalink($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', '')); break; case 'date': $postDate = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_date_gmt"); $text = $base->convert_post_date($postDate); break; case 'date_day': $postDate = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_date_gmt"); $text = date('dd',strtotime($postDate)); break; case 'date_month': $postDate = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_date_gmt"); $text = date('m',strtotime($postDate)); break; case 'date_month_abbr': $postDate = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_date_gmt"); $text = date('M',strtotime($postDate)); break; case 'date_year': $postDate = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_date_gmt"); $text = date('Y',strtotime($postDate)); break; case 'date_year_abbr': $postDate = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_date_gmt"); $text = date('y',strtotime($postDate)); break; case 'date_modified': $dateModified = $base->getVar($this->post, "post_modified"); $text = $base->convert_post_date($dateModified); break; case 'author_name': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $text = get_the_author_meta('display_name', $authorID); break; case 'author_posts': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $text = get_author_posts_url($authorID ); break; case 'author_profile': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $meta_value = get_the_author_meta('url', $authorID); break; case 'author_avatar_32': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $meta_value = get_avatar( $authorID, 32); break; case 'author_avatar_64': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $meta_value = get_avatar( $authorID, 64); break; case 'author_avatar_96': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $meta_value = get_avatar( $authorID, 96); break; case 'author_avatar_512': $authorID = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_author'); $meta_value = get_avatar( $authorID, 512); break; case 'num_comments': $text = $base->getVar($this->post, 'comment_count'); break; case 'cat_list': $use_taxonomies = false; $postCatsIDs = $base->getVar($this->post, 'post_category'); if(empty($postCatsIDs) && isset($this->post['post_type'])){ $postCatsIDs = array(); $obj = get_object_taxonomies($this->post['post_type']); if(!empty($obj) && is_array($obj)){ foreach($obj as $tax){ if($tax == 'post_tag') continue; $use_taxonomies[] = $tax; $new_terms = get_the_terms($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''), $tax); if(is_array($new_terms) && !empty($new_terms)){ foreach($new_terms as $term){ $postCatsIDs[$term->term_id] = $term->term_id; } } } } } /* 2.1.5 category max option */ if($adjustMax && is_array($postCatsIDs)) $postCatsIDs = array_slice($postCatsIDs, 0, $catmax, true); $text = $base->get_categories_html_list($postCatsIDs, $function, $separator, $use_taxonomies); break; case 'tag_list': if(!$adjustMax) { $text = $base->get_tags_html_list($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''), $separator, $function); } else { $text = $base->get_tags_html_list($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''), $separator, $function, $catmax); } break; case 'taxonomy': if(!$adjustMax) { $text = $base->get_tax_html_list($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''), $taxonomy, $separator, $function); } else { $text = $base->get_tax_html_list($base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''), $taxonomy, $separator, $function, $catmax); } break; /* case 'iframe': print '
HELLO!
'; die(); break; */ default: $text = apply_filters('essgrid_post_meta_content', $text, $handle, $base->getVar($this->post, 'ID', ''), $this->post); break; } return $text; } /** * Retrieve the value of post elements */ public function get_custom_element_value($handle, $separator, $meta = ''){ $base = new Essential_Grid_Base(); $m = new Essential_Grid_Meta(); $text = ''; $text = $base->getVar($this->layer_values, $handle, ''); if($text == '' && $meta != '') $text = $base->getVar($this->layer_values, $meta, ''); if(intval($text) > 0){ //we may be an image from the metas $custom_meta = $m->get_all_meta(false); if(!empty($custom_meta)){ foreach($custom_meta as $cmeta){ if($cmeta['handle'] == $handle){ if($cmeta['type'] == 'image'){ $img = wp_get_attachment_image_src($text, $this->media_sources_type); if($img !== false){ $text = $img[0]; //replace with URL } } break; } } } } return $text; } /** * Retrieve the value of event elements */ public function get_event_manager_value($handle){ $base = new Essential_Grid_Base(); $text = ''; switch($handle){ //check for event manager case 'event_start_date': break; case 'event_end_date': break; case 'event_start_time': break; case 'event_end_time': break; case 'event_event_id': break; case 'event_location_name': break; case 'event_location_slug': break; case 'event_location_address': break; case 'event_location_town': break; case 'event_location_state': break; case 'event_location_postcode': break; case 'event_location_region': break; case 'event_location_country': break; } return $text; } /** * Retrieve the value of woocommerce elements */ public function get_woocommerce_value($meta, $separator, $catmax = false){ $text = ''; if(isset($this->post['ID'])){ if(Essential_Grid_Woocommerce::is_woo_exists()){ $base = new Essential_Grid_Base(); $m = new Essential_Grid_Meta(); /* 2.1.5 category max option */ $adjustMax = false; if($meta === 'wc_categories') { if(!empty($catmax) && $catmax !== '-1' && is_numeric($catmax) && intval($catmax) > 0) { $catmax = intval($catmax); $adjustMax = true; } } if($adjustMax) { $text = Essential_Grid_Woocommerce::get_value_by_meta($this->post['ID'], $meta, $separator, $catmax); } else { $text = Essential_Grid_Woocommerce::get_value_by_meta($this->post['ID'], $meta, $separator); } } } return $text; } }________________________________________________________________________________
Maybe my story will help someone in their own journey. Whether they are trans, cis, gay, straight, lesbian, religious, or non religious. I sincerely hope that my story inspires someone.
Kyra is working hard on her trans journey and learning to love herself!I have always struggled with my body, my whole life, before I even knew the difference between “boys”, and “girls”. From the time I was 3 everyone in my life had told me, I had to look a certain way, be a certain way, talk a certain way, dress a certain way. As you might already know or have deduced, I am trans, so I was born a boy and as I got older, it was enforced more and more into me that I had to be a ‘boy’.
Then I was moved into foster care, this led to me moving 8 or 9 times in the span of a few years. And when I was adopted, I began to experience what you would call Extreme body dysmorphia, I would look in the mirror, and I would only see everything I wasn’t, as I entered my teen years. This got worse, especially as puberty began, ‘male puberty’ which only worsened my body image issues.
I remember staying up at nights breaking down on to the floor and crying. Because I knew that I would never look fully like a girl. Even today I can’t get rid of the overwhelming knowledge that I will never be a biological woman, I will never be able to give birth, the world will never fully see me for who I truly am, but through years of loving myself, giving myself the love that no one would, I have accepted my body, and I can very easily look in the mirror now, sometimes a little too much
, but I have learned to love myself, I still struggle in small ways with very minor dysmorphia, mostly with my voice , but I do live everyday as the woman know I am, and if I do say so myself, I look absolutely stunning!!
Kyra Keanna
The post “I knew that I would never look fully like a girl” Kyras Story appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>How one girl was bullied into buying her first bra.
This post was published originally in Girls Gone Global (by Dear Alyne), a facebook group where over 100,000 women from around the world hang out and support each other!
FEARLESS FRIDAY-
Up until grade 6 (11 years of age), I was in a co-ed gym class and everyone wore the same clothes during the class as we did during the day.
Grade 7, I started Junior High in a new town. Gym class was now female only and we had to have proper clothes. We had to change before and after class together. At first, this was foreign concept to me and I changed privately in a bathroom stall I was embarrassed to not be comfortable to change in front of the others, so I started to force myself to. I was 12. I didn’t wear a bra, but a few others did. I didn’t think much of it however one girl made comments. Loud comments pointing out that I wasn’t wearing one. She wanted to ensure everyone heard her and, looked at me. I wanted to hide. I wanted to go back to changing in private.
I had started to develop but, I certainly didn’t need a bra. No one in that class “needed” one, they just wanted to be grown up… and I was in no rush. With that said, I didn’t want to be made fun of either.
I didn’t want to be bullied. She won. That night I bought my first bra.
I hated purchasing it. I was embarrassed about shopping for one. I was so embarrassed I didn’t want to tell my mom. I basically grabbed the first one I saw, it had little Mickey Mouse heads all over it.
Well… since she did my laundry, she quickly found out I had a bra. She bought me more. The good news is this saved me from the embarrassment of shopping for one. She bought me the type that came in a box from the department store. That’s pretty much all I wore through high school.
At 18 I started college. At 19 I moved into residence. Instead of being told to wear a bra, my female roommates tried to make me wear backless revealing shirts, and encouraged me to not wear a bra. I was now being told not to wear one when previously I was told to wear one. It was confusing. I ignored their comment, the bra stayed on. The shirts I wore were conservative.
At 21 I moved to the city. I joined a gym. Ladies in the gym would walk around completely nude. They weren’t shy. Walking from the locker room to showers completely in the buff. It was intimidating. I changed in a private washroom and, slowly got the nerve to change openly, but never used the showers. Around the age of 22 I started showering in the gym… but I covered myself with a towel to walk around. It took me years to gain the confidence to do this.
As my confidence grew, I went to a lingerie store and bought an expensive bra. The first time I went into a lingerie store, the anxiety and embarrassment I had in grade 7 came rushing back. A sales lady quickly whisked me into a change room. She measured me. I smiled through my clenched teeth from being beyond uncomfortable. I bought the first one she gave me and, I ran out of the store. In actual fact, I bought 3 of the same so I could avoid the experience for as long as possible.
The next morning I put on my purchase. For the first time ever (minus my training bra) I had a non-beige bra. It made me feel good. I started to wear more revealing shirts when going out. I realized I had some nice “assets” why not dress them up and show them off a bit?
I began to be more comfortable in my body.
Fast forward to today, I still don’t have the confidence that others do. I only gained the confidence to wear a bikini in the last 5 years.
I am soon to be 35. At times, I still have to push myself to be comfortable in my own skin. It has taken a long time for me to own my body!
Were you ever uncomfortable or intimidated by changing in front of others?
Do you think that culture has something to do with it?
Love, CHRISTINE!
The post How one girl was bullied into buying her first bra appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>Feminist Friday
Many cultures has myths about period. In some cases, a normal physical process like this is considered taboo!
Well I’ve also seen people believing in myths about period and this is how I dealt with it:
Last month my mom noticed some fungus growing on the jar of pickles she made.
Our housemaid said that someone must’ve touched the jar while on her period, and that’s why the fungus grew.
I tried convincing her that it was a myth and she didn’t fully believe me.
The day after, discovering that my cycle has started, I called her out with another jar full of fresh pickles on my hand. I put my hand on the pickles and told her, ‘My period has started today. We’ll see when the fungus will grow on them.’
She stared at me as if I have lost my head. But after this event, I don’t know if she had checked the pickles or not, but I hope she stopped believing in that myth!
Read the comments to the original post here, and join the Girls Gone Global Facebook group (women only!) to take part in the discussion!
The post I was period shamed, and this is how I dealt with it – GGG appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>I’m Ciara Mae B. Eom, a 21 year old Filipina. I’m an Aquaculture Science Researcher by profession. I’m not here to brag about what I’ve got right now because I haven’t actually achieved anything aside from being a researcher at this young age.
I’m here to give an inspiration to all girls and show that poverty is not always an obstacle when it comes to finishing studying and being able to pursue your dreams.
I was born in a low profile family and was raised by a single mom. I wasn’t handed a college education but with full perseverance I didn’t let it hinder me, and I pursued my education myself.
I worked several part time jobs. I worked at night and would go directly to school in the morning during my first year in college. It was tough and at times frustrating but I pursued my education got myself several scholarships. I walked to school every morning and afternoon alone but all of these struggles had been surpassed by a single diploma.
All the while I thought that a single diploma was all worth it, but now as I am engaged in a job,
I find that no diploma nor any recognition can surpass the beauty which can be taught by experience alone.
I am thankful and consider myself blessed because I survived 5 tough years in college.
I would like to remind everybody that as every single day passes by do not be afraid to explore and venture. I’m excited for what is in store for me!
And I would like to thank every girl involved here for the inspiration you give me daily.
Join the discussion by commenting on this post in Girls Gone Global (by Dear Alyne!). It’s for women only!
The post I am poor, but I found a way to become a researcher appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>Open Topic MONDAY!!!! – Don’t give up
I am Aliya Patel, a blessed mother of two and extrovert by nature.
At present I am 39, got married at early age of 18 to a civil engineer. I have a son who is going to be 20 and daughter who is 19.
I am from INDIA and since my kids are grown up pursuing their higher education overseas, after giving 20 years of my life to this family I thought of completing my OWN education. I am now an undergraduate.
I have always been passionate about studies and wanted to pursue something but could not. When I shared this with my daughter she encouraged me to complete my graduation now and keep going ahead with whatever I want to do.
So at present I am completing my graduation and also I am training myself to be an educational career counsellor. I’m doing an online course from UCLA, training myself in public speaking and some basic human behavioral skills and also doing a sociology course where I can get connected with the younger generation and support them for making decisions and can learn a lot from these millennials.
I miss my kids a lot and I enjoy the company of these youngsters as I don’t like to be with my extended family – because like everyone else I have suffered a lot and was even being abused by them.
I have started all this in August 2018 and I feel I am blessed as over these 20 years, I was unaware of the outside world. But now I have a group of friends (you girls at GGG) with whom I can really talk to as professionals. We are an inspiration to one another. We women are born for something great which needs to be honored, and respected… SO HEY GIRLS!!!!!! KEEP GOING… LOVE YOU ALLL!!!!!
To join the community discussion or write a post of your own to over 100,000 women, join Girls Gone Global (by Dear Alyne), for women only.
The post I followed my passion of studying at 39 – GGG appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>Part 3: I’m finally on the right track of life, and it’s thanks to you girls
November 11th, 2018
Living in Singapore has been one of the happiest times of my life. I want to thank, yes, once again, all the GGG ladies for their incredible support. Especially my friend Kai, who I met through the group, who gave me the tools to start my life in Singapore as a waitress with a place to stay for about ten days.
I am happy.
At the end of my first trimester, I finished with all A’s in my courses! I have many close friends who care for me, we have a lot of fun going out, talking, or playing, as well as studying and supporting each other. I have an incredible paid internship on a topic that I care about with a friendly, smart, and understanding boss. I also met Alyne, Nas, and Agon, which made my year! I also met GGG’s Singaporean group, who are a bunch of strong and amazing women. And three days ago the Dean from my school contacted me to offer me to work for him as a part time student research assistant! How did this even happen!?
I am beyond grateful! My life has been turned around in less than a year from nothing to everything that I could have ever dreamt of! Even when this master’s degree ends, now I know what I have to do, and I have all of these people surrounding me that I can count on (and they on me). I will keep working hard, taking advantage of all opportunities that are presented to me.
Thank you Alyne, because Girls Gone Global has impacted my life in ways I could not have imagined.
To all ladies out there still struggling. Just keep trying. Do not feel afraid to ask for help. I promise it gets better.
Check out the first and second posts if you have not read them yet.
Join our Facebook group Girls Gone Global (for women only) to share your own story and meet many other awesome women!
The post My life changed, and a big reason is Girls Gone Global – GGG (Part 3/3) appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>Part 2: My turning point in life
June 5th, 2018
I wanted to let you know, following on my last post, that I GOT ACCEPTED TO THE MASTER’S DEGREE!
First of all, I want to thank every single woman who took the time to message me with advice, wished me nice thoughts, gave me strength, and empathised with my situation.
I was driving from a long day at the internship, almost home, when I heard my phone’s email notification sound. I glanced quickly and saw the university’s I applied to name. My heart raced as I carefully parked my mom’s car. I immediately ran into the living room yelling at the top of my lungs to my parents “The results are in!”
I opened the email, took a couple of minutes to open up, my heart beating fast and I read “We are pleased to inform you…” Tears flowed out of my eyes like rivers going down my cheeks while laughing uncontrollably like crazy. I hugged both of my parents and I called some of my loved ones to give them the great news. And now finally, after a year of being lost, insecure, unsure and disappointed with myself, finally, I feel at peace.
Everything fell into place. I had, once again, a path to follow. A passion for what I will be doing. I felt valuable again.
To be honest, I hate to admit that this was the turning point that made me believe in myself again, that helped me see I am valuable and that I have potential. I should have never forgotten this in the first place, no matter the circumstances. We are all valuable, and we should never let ourselves forget that. That is something that GGG group has helped me realize.
I just want to say thank you to all the amazing GGG girls. Your comments were absolutely important and helped me remember who I was.
The next step: Unfortunately, I did not get a scholarship. I will be applying for a loan, which is a little scary, but I believe it is worth it.
I will be studying International Political Economy in Nanyang’s Technological University’s Rajaratnam School of International Studies (RSIS) in Singapore. Despite this being so different from my undergraduate degree, I plan to put all my effort to excel and take advantage of this unparalleled opportunity. Singapore is also one of the only three city-states in the world with so much potential and influence, and I just cannot believe that I will be living there for at least a year! I need to be there in July, just one month from now so I need to be quick.
Now I am a step closer to fulfilling my dreams, and I love every single girl in Girls Gone Global and I am, again, forever grateful for your comments, the group, and your lives… From the bottom of my heart, you are all amazing and remember I am here as a friend to anyone who would like to talk, meet, ask, or anything else.
Check out the first post in this series if you haven’t already, and read the third part here!
Join our Facebook group Girls Gone Global (for women only) to share your own story and meet many other awesome women!
The post My life changed, and a big reason is Girls Gone Global – GGG (2/3) appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>
A few things I want to say
When I said “Albania has a problem with sexism” my intent wasn’t to generalize, I just meant I know the country does have some problems there. Unicef, and other international organizations have written many reports about it. (Female infanticide, 40% domestic abuse). I only mentioned Albania/Balkans…because I was in Albania. MANY COUNTRIES HAVE THESE PROBLEMS, and MANY are MUCH worse.
Albania is a great country and I don’t want this video to reflect badly on them, You’ll notice my video before this is about how Albania is my favorite country. Every country has pros and cons and should be looked at as a whole, not just focusing on an area that needs work.
I also do not hold anything against the show. Not everyone has the same grasp of or dedication to ethics so this is not meant to insult them.
This is simply meant to show girls like me that we are allowed to say NO when things they are not comfortable with are happening.
Also, check out the full video and blog post here.
In this blog post, I also included screenshots of some beautiful supportive messages I got from Albanians around the world beneath the video. I made a video last week about how Albania is my favorite country.
I will not let one event make me dislike a country. Albania is still my favorite country, is beautiful, and lovely. Every country has room to improve, and I don’t judge countries based on their problems.
Albania is still my favorite country, is beautiful, and lovely. Every country has room to improve, and I don’t judge countries based on their problems.
The post Is this funny? appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>Recently, I was at a gathering where A was telling B that I’m a good cook. The reply B gave was: “Of course. Not surprising. Look at her.”
And conversations like this one have happened many times.
Why? Why look at me? Why does my physical appearance determine my ability to cook?
Yes, I’m overweight. Yes, I love food.
Thanks to these people, these two factors apparently determine a person’s cooking skill.
I have been overweight ever since I was in primary school. My weight has decreased and increased over time. I rarely succeed at losing weight. Even when my will was at 200%, I had only managed to lose a few kilograms as it is really hard for me.
You might think it’s probably because I’m not an active person. Believe me, I was an active person until a year ago and my weight was the same even then.
Do people think I like being overweight?
When I was in standard 3, my Malay language teacher used to reprimand me in front of the whole class all the time. We had those blue and really strong wooden chairs in class, and I had this habit of tilting the chair forward as I’m sitting on it, while leaning on the table. She would shout from the front of the class “Safina, the chair will break. You’re fat. Remember that!”
And she would enjoy a good laugh with the rest of the class. I was 9 years old and at around 36kg (79lbs). She just wanted to make a joke at the cost of a fat person.
There was even a close relative who made fun of my weight throughout my life, calling me “fat” many times. Until one day, I lost it and shouted at the person for all their words of torture. Then that person said “It’s just a joke.”
A joke? Really? I already had enough insults from outsiders, I didn’t need this stupid joke from a close family member.
When I was studying in college, I had a crush on my classmate. One day, we were all walking back to our dorms after the last class of the evening and I was looking at the queue at the cafeteria nearby (I was famished) so I didn’t look left and right before crossing the road. A girlfriend next to me realized I was going to be hit by a motorbike and pulled me to safety, saying “Safina, be careful!”
My crush was among those walking with us and he said, “Oh chill. Even if a car hit her, she would’ve survived. She’s fat.”
Thanks to him, I didn’t have my dinner, and I cried all night to the point where my roommates had to call my best friend to talk to me. But it didn’t help and I was depressed for the next 2 weeks.
These are just three of the hundreds of examples of how I got belittled due to my weight. I started becoming a good cook only around one and a half years ago. It was when I was living in Spain and wanted to save up to travel around Europe as food outside was really expensive.
If being a good cook is the reason why I’m fat, why was I fat all those years before that?
Recently, I started taking hormone medications. I also have had imbalanced hormones since I was 10 years old. A hard time losing weight is one of the consequences. Only my family and closest friends know about this. My doctor’s weight loss goal for me is only 5kg (11lbs) in the next 6 months. Can you see how little she aims for me to lose due to my hormone issue?
My point here is, being concerned for me due to health issues is understandable. My friends say I’m pretty. My boyfriend says I’m the most beautiful woman he knows and I truly know he means it. He never understands when I go on a diet. And yet, I am currently on a diet to actually make myself feel even more pretty and be happier.
So, then, why are people just so harsh? Why is it, that in 2018, people are still belittling fat people? Making mean jokes? Calling us names? Saying we’re good at tug of war because we’re fat? Throwing stones at me because I’m fat? If you’re concerned about my health, you sit down and talk to me nicely. Belittling me just makes me want to find solace in food.
Stop these stereotypes. I’m a good cook because I love cooking. I find happiness in it. Not because I’m fat.
Have a great day and enjoy the pictures of some of my master pieces 
The post I’m fat and I’m a good cook appeared first on Dear Alyne.
]]>Please don’t laugh when people make sexist, racist jokes. Our laughter is our support. If they tell you you’re making a big deal out of nothing, tell them sexism is a big deal. If they tell you it’s just a joke, say that jokes at other people’s expense are not JOKES, and are not funny.
P.S. We reuploaded this video because this channel wants attention and views and I don’t want to support them in doing that.
Here’s the transcript!
Ermal (the host): Here now will come a girl that wants to ask you a question Nas. Are you ready?
(English part:)
Ermal: Arber are you ready? Coz u are already used to these kind of things. (Public laughs).
Ermal: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome Kejvina. (Kejvina Enters)
Ermal: Nas, don’t turn around, because other than her eyes, you will see a couple of other eyes (referring to her breasts). Alyne, you can see, but Nas can’t. (Ermal laughs).
Ermal: Kejvina, ask the question please.
Kejvina: I will say it in Albanian coz I’m not good at English….. So, ummm, I don’t know how to formulate it.
Ermal: Say it in Albanian darling.
Kejvina: You travel quite often. But how do you find time to dedicate it to your girlfriend?
Ermal: No no this is not the question
Kejvina: Yes it is
Ermal: No it isn’t.
Kejvina: Yes this is the question, because we changed the previous one. Don’t try to put me into an argument with other people!
Ermal: Come here and read it how it’s written
Kejvina: But we’ve changed it….
(someone talks from the backstage) Ermal: Ah, they didn’t want this question?
Nas says WHO CHANGED THE QUESTION
Ermal: Who changed the question then?
Kejvina: While on backstage I spoke with Arbrer
Ermal: Ah so you Arber changed the question?
Arber: The question was “when you go on trips, you do that to meet girls?” but to me it makes no sense as a question, because Nas is all the time with Alyne!
Kejvina: This question is very uneducated and inappropriate!
Ermal: No no no, keep the question you had before.
Ermal: We have the question now!
Kejvina does the question….
Alyne: This is not funny. Women in Albania are treated like shit.
Ermal: This was a stupid question
Alyne argues with Ermal about who’s insulting whom.
Ermal: Let’s do another question
Alyne: People should hear this.
Ermal to Kejvina: Look, ask this question to make it up for the previous question. You’re gonna ask “in all the places you’ve been, where would you like to propose to your gf?”
Kejvina: Ok this is better.
Kejvina: (jokingly saying) Now I will look at Arber while I ask the question because I am afraid to look this way (meaning Nas and Alyne might get angry again).
Ermal: Now ask the question I told you
Kejvina: No, it would be better to ask “in which of the countries would like to live with your gf”, not where to marry her. Maybe they don’t wanna marry, why should we force them to admit now?
Ermal: Please ask the marriage question. Ok we have the question
Alyne: Just cut anything that I said that offends Albania, coz I like Albania.
Kejvina asks the question about the wedding.
Nas: This is a boring question.
Ermal: I hope your girlfriend likes this question
Ermal: Thank you Kejvina. This was one of the most uncomfortable questions Kejvina has done throughout 3 years of this programme.
And here are some of the awesome responses people sent!
We want to highlight the people who care and empower women. Here are some messages I received that gave me hope for the world. 
(I’ve cropped out their names in case they want privacy!)
The post This talk show host thought it was okay to ask a sexist question on television appeared first on Dear Alyne.
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